Category: top ten
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Top Ten Excuses for Missing Shul
These are the Top Ten Excuses for Missing Shul on Shabbos Morning. Please use them with discretion. Excuse Number 10: The Dog ate my Shabbos Shoes Excuse Number 9: The Cholent overpowered me and wouldn’t let me leave the house Excuse Number 8: I was meditating on a higher plane and lost track of existence… Read more
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Top Ten Biblical Names
… That you probably won’t name your kids: In alphabetical order this time: Number 1 Artaxerxes: Ezra 7:13-28. Number 2 Merodach-baladan: Isaiah 39: 1 Number 3 Chedorlaomer: Bereishis 14 Number 4 Chushan-Rishathaim Shoftim 3: 8 Number 5 Gomer: HOshea 1: 3 Number 6 Hadadrimmon Zechariah 12: 11 Number 7 Ham: Bereishis 5: 32 Number 8… Read more
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Top Ten Things NOT To Do During the Rabbi’s Sermon
TOP TEN THINGS NOT TO DO DURING THE RABBI’S SERMON: (cross posted from www.torahlab.org) Number 10: Read a book Number 9: Pretend to be reading a book Number 8: Read a banned book Number 7: Fall asleep Number 6: Fall asleep and snore loudly Number 5: play ‘Sermon Cricket’ (see below) Number 4: give a… Read more
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Top Ten Words that sound as though they are Yiddish but Aren’t
Top Ten Words That Sound as though they are Yiddish, but Aren’t: Number 10 – Farfetched Number 9 – Invocation Number 8 – Flummoxed Number 7 – Gobsmacked Number 6 – Innersprung Number 5 – Gerund Number 4 – Forefinger Number 3 – Henpecked Number 2 – Scooped AND the Number 1 Word That Sounds… Read more